A Reflection on the Occasion of a Memorial Service
for Mary Baugh English
April 15, 1925 - May 17, 2017
All Saints’ Episcopal Church, Southern Shores,
NC Thomas E. Wilson, Rector
Isaiah 40: 1-5, 28-31 Psalm 23 John
10:11-16
We all have mothers. We were nourished inside them
and then we were separated from their body and we entered into a new
relationship with them - a reunion. As we grow up we become the process of
separating from each other - leaving for school or work, getting married. We
spend the early part of life finding out who we are really are instead of being
just an extension of someone else. Over the years we will fight about things
and learn how to reconcile. Much energy
will be spent as there will be many separations and reunions. It is in the
respecting of the differences that we start to find our core of unions. Then
there will be a final time when death will separate us, and we will feel the
emptiness when we realize how much of ourselves we have lost. The reason we
come together today is to remind ourselves that our faith tells us that there
is a final reunion.
Union, separation, and reunion: this is the central
archetype of all life, movements of energy between union and separation and
reunion. The universe was created billions of years ago with a Big Bang
explosion separating the universe from itself, dividing light from dark, sun,
moon, stars, and planets on which land and sea were separated. Then out of the
stardust, plants and animals became differentiated, male and female were made
differently, and yet with all the
separations, there was an inner core of union with each other. At the end of
life, we return into union with the earth. The energy that created the universe
is still expanding and when it stops billions of years from now, it will begin
to contract into a union.
There is a story told about Albert Einstein when he
was hanging out at Princeton. He was asked by some students to try to water
down his theories, especially relativity, E= MC squared, into a simpler
form. He told them to come back the next
day, and when they returned he said, “Something moves.”
Union, separation and reunion is the central theme
is the scripture. The Isaiah passage that Mary wanted to be read for her
service, “they shall run and not be weary” is a song of welcome to the exiles that
were held captive in Babylon who were returning to their homes after their long
separation. The return will be an awakening of the movement of energy so “they
shall run and not be weary.” The 23rd Psalm is a song of a person
returning to a reunion with the LORD, as a sheep to its shepherd, to be in the
deep energy of the still water by the shadow of death where there is no fear.
The Gospel of John passage is Jesus saying that he is that shepherd calling all
of us sheep back to reunion with the divine, claiming the spirit, the energy of
God within us where this is one flock and one shepherd. Something moves, and it
is the energy of the universe.
Union, separation and reunion: Mary went through all
of these many times in her life. She left her home in Staunton, Virginia and
ended up in the Outer Banks. She got married, had children, and she learned how
to live after losses. She was strong and vibrant, she was a real pistol, and
then she started losing her strength. She changed churches, even here on the
Outer Banks, and got used to different clergy types and congregations.
Every Sunday worship service, every meeting of the
Solo group, every Bible study was a reunion followed by a separation followed by
a reunion. When she would come to these meetings, she loved being welcomed, having
people pay attention to her and fuss all over her. When she had the strength to
come up to communion, and if I was holding a baby after she received the bread
from me, she would stop and lay her hand on the cheek or feet of the baby to
claim a connection. Little children would stop at her seat on the way to
communion and give her a hug, and she would touch their cheeks in a sort of
benediction, for she knew that the Priest was not the only person in the parish
who had the power to bless. Blessing others is a requirement for all followers
of God. I think mothers enjoyed seeing their children greet Mary since they
envisioned a future when their children would be all grown up and they would
all be playing the role of little old lady. She made the role look attractive
by giving thanks.
Yet, she could hold a grudge with the best of them,
and there were times when the kindly little old lady role wore more than a
little thin. We are not asked to be perfect. We are asked to love, and most of
the time she could love as she went through union, separation, and reunion. We
know that the energy of life is love and it is only in forgiveness that it is
set free.
Today we
commend her to God and we declare that she has been fully reunited with the God
who knew and loved her before she was born and with all the friends and family
she has lost. We come also to ask for strength to meet the days ahead when,
after this separation, we will be reunited with her to join the river of energy
in which we all live and move and have our being.
Mary
English
While
raised in a small southern city
Now
enjoying as like a queen treated
As
arriving at her church to be seated
Where
minions tell her she‘s so pretty!
Said
she wasn’t flashy, yet was her whim
To
have the little children give her a hug
As
they passed by on the way to a chug
Of
wine or wafer before singing a hymn.
Adored
being fussed over, yet didn’t pass
Up
an opportunity to take moment to give
Thanks
for all blessings by grace she did live
In
this life, waiting for new blessing to amass.
She
could be a real trial, but still loved indeed
And
in this journey is how we claim to succeed.
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