Already And Not Yet

 This is the reflection and Poem I would have given but  my body had other plans and I took the Covid home Test and  it told me I had Covid so I had to cancel being around people for awhile . The theme is how we live into "Already and Not Yet" places roles and identities in our lives. It actually fits since I was ignorant how my body was moving from looking fairly healthy to be caught up to being a danger to others.

Reflection and Poem for 25th Sunday after Pentecost                 Thomas Wilson , Guest Celebrant

Episcopal Church of the Holy Trinity, Hertford, NC                    October 30, 2023

Already and Not Yet

On most Friday evenings at 5:00 for the last couple months, I enter into a habit of meeting with two long time friends for a evening of old men talking openly and honestly with each other. One was a member of the search committee that came to visit me in Georgia. I became Rector of his church for 15 years and his friend for 20 years. The other is a former Roman Catholic Priest who left the order to get married and I met him trying to persuade him to become an Episcopal Priest. I failed, but he is still a faithful attending member of the church where I was once a Rector and now no longer attend regularly to give the New Rector plenty of breathing space. We come together as three old men whose wives are no longer with us. We talk about things like; “How to fix the right Martini, or Manhattan”, “What kind of hopes for the future of our world, our country, our state, our community and our lives together and separately.” We come to pay attention to each other, to affirm who we are without jobs that define us.

Last week we were meeting at my home. That day I had gone to the grocery store, made some guacamole, ran a load of laundry, vacuumed the unit, dusted and polished the furniture, took out the trash, and walked the dog for the 3^rd time (he is an old man as well). However, when 5:00 came, the doorbell rang and I found myself in the “already and not yet” time.

They came in and took their places in the living room while we talked over the kitchen counter and I put together the food on the soon groaning card table. Took the glasses out of the freezer, the gin out of the refrigerator, shook, stirred, added the olives or cherries and delivered the drinks to their hands. The “already and not yet” time took a little less than 10 minutes and then I joined them by sitting in one of the chairs in the living room. As I sipped the first Martini, those 10 minutes hit me a a metaphor for the lessons for today that I had been looking at that morning. That is what it feels like to be in the “already and not yet” time of every moment in faith.

In the Hebrew Testament lesson for today Moses has come to the Promised Land, and he has reached the already and not yet end of his journey because he will not enter the Promised Land in this life.

In the Psalm for today the Psalmist sings the already and not yet song of the Faithful to the God who is so close and yet can seem so far away:

13 Return, O Lord; how long will you tarry? *
be gracious to your servants.

14 Satisfy us by your loving-kindness in the morning; *
so shall we rejoice and be glad all the days of our life.

15 Make us glad by the measure of the days that you afflicted us *
and the years in which we suffered adversity.

16 Show your servants your works *
and your splendor to their children.

17 May the graciousness of the Lord our God be upon us; *
prosper the work of our hands;
prosper our handiwork.

In the Epistle Paul, the Pharisee Christian Persecutor who made the journey to be an Evangelist and teacher of the Faith to the people of the Church in Thessaloniki is giving up his past, his present and future, already and not yet, on his journey to his death in Rome.

In the Gospel lesson, Jesus is meeting with the Pharisees. The Pharisee group was made up by the most faithful and distinguished men in the community. These were highly religious people. Yet, they could not lay their religion to the side, in order to listen to the already and not yet Good News of the Gospel.

Every prayer that we make is an exercise in the already and not yet. We begin by beginning to visualize what we want. Then we ground that vision in the promises of God. Suppose, we begin to pray for peace among all of God's children. We stop and visualize those who are fighting against each other and see them as members of families, as full of fear and anger. If it helps, look for pictures on line. In imagination we ask that some of that fear and pain can be given to us and pray for that healing within that person and within us. You might want to take John O'Donahue's poem into your quiet space and read that as a vocal prayer as a beginning and not yet exercise that peace begins within each one of us:

Blessing for Peace

As the fever of day calms towards twilight
May all that is strained in us come to ease.
We pray for all who suffered violence today,
May an unexpected serenity surprise them.
For those who risk their lives each day for peace,
May their hearts glimpse providence at the heart of history.
That those who make riches from violence and war
Might hear in their dreams the cries of the lost.
That we might see through our fear of each other
A new vision to heal our fatal attraction to aggression.
That those who enjoy the privilege of peace
Might not forget their tormented brothers and sisters.
That the wolf might lie down with the lamb,
That our swords be beaten into ploughshares
And no hurt or harm be done
Anywhere along the holy mountain.

This coming week we will have a service in honor of the Christian Life and Death of Dick Carlson Jr, your fellow Parishioner who has, already and not yet completed, his journey on Earth and in the arms of God. It is time also for this church, already and not yet to mourn the loss of a good faithful man in the church and to help his family mourn during this already and not yet time.

The thing about mourning is that it take a longer time than we wish. My wife died a little over four months ago. She started getting seriously sick, five years ago, shortly after I was a couple months away from the Mandatory retirement age for being a Rector of the church which I had served for fifteen years. As she was getting weaker, I stopped helping out churches out of town for six months before she died. She was on Hospice for a little less than a week. We had been in Already and not yet time for five years and I am still in it, and will be for quite awhile.

My guests who were coming to my home nine days ago shared the experience of the already and not yet journey on what it is like to be a widower and we treasured the love given to us in that journey. We learned that love is a gift freely given or withheld, one day at a time; it is never earned.

This church is in the process of the already and not yet searching for a new Rector. You began by saying good bye to the old Rector and thanking him for what he was able to do and to forgive him for what he was not able to do. I have been ordained for almost 37 and a half years served as: 1) Assistant in one church, 2)Rector in three and 3) helped out in a bunch of others in the five years since I reached the mandatory retirement age and 4) been married to Pat for 34 years, For all of those days, weeks , months and years; I have received thanks and forgiveness, both of which I needed and desired. Each day of those 37 and a half years I was already and not yet a Faithful Christian.

Martin Luther said it best, we live “simul justus et peccador”, or in English “simultaneously justified and yet a sinner” He explained “thus a Christian man (by which he means person) is righteous and a sinner at the same time, holy and profane, an enemy of God and a child of God. None of the sophists will admit this paradox because they do not understand the true meaning of justification.” By this, I think he means justification is never earned; rather it is only conferred by the Power Greater than ourselves.

Already and Not Yet

We aren't physically in the same room,

yet our dialogue isn't really monologue,

while you're not here; least there's dog

here to substitute to lighten the gloom.

It's a little like when I converse in prayer,

and the Almighty sure doesn't keep up

the Big Side, or at least say like, a “Yup”

every once in a while to say She's there.

I dream about a walking future with you,

where you point out what I might miss,

because you always pay attention to this

or that bird that moment overhead flew.

I keep wanting to hold on to you tight,

'cause letting go just doesn't seem right.