Thursday, May 25, 2017

Something Moves: Poem for Sunday After the Feast of the Ascension 2017



I will not be at the church on Sunday but this is my Poem for the Sunday after the Feast of the Ascension May 27, 2017

Something Moves
Something moves in our relationship
You were no longer there in my sight
I want to hold on to a one more night
or at least to have you within easy grip.
But you were gone, unable to be touched.
Yes, I could hold on to some memories
And then chance a reunion of stories
Where can create a together unclutched
By desires of empty need of your identity
But now since I am separated I’ll find me,
The real me, the one alive and fully free
By finding the deeper union with serenity
Of you living in me, being in each breath
I take in, now and then beyond my death.

Thursday, May 18, 2017

Reflection and Poem for Mary Baugh English



A Reflection on the Occasion of a Memorial Service for Mary Baugh English
April 15, 1925 - May 17, 2017
All Saints’ Episcopal Church, Southern Shores, NC         Thomas E. Wilson, Rector
Isaiah 40: 1-5, 28-31               Psalm 23                      John 10:11-16

We all have mothers. We were nourished inside them and then we were separated from their body and we entered into a new relationship with them - a reunion. As we grow up we become the process of separating from each other - leaving for school or work, getting married. We spend the early part of life finding out who we are really are instead of being just an extension of someone else. Over the years we will fight about things and learn how to reconcile.  Much energy will be spent as there will be many separations and reunions. It is in the respecting of the differences that we start to find our core of unions. Then there will be a final time when death will separate us, and we will feel the emptiness when we realize how much of ourselves we have lost. The reason we come together today is to remind ourselves that our faith tells us that there is a final reunion.

Union, separation, and reunion: this is the central archetype of all life, movements of energy between union and separation and reunion. The universe was created billions of years ago with a Big Bang explosion separating the universe from itself, dividing light from dark, sun, moon, stars, and planets on which land and sea were separated. Then out of the stardust, plants and animals became differentiated, male and female were made differently, and yet  with all the separations, there was an inner core of union with each other. At the end of life, we return into union with the earth. The energy that created the universe is still expanding and when it stops billions of years from now, it will begin to contract into a union.

There is a story told about Albert Einstein when he was hanging out at Princeton. He was asked by some students to try to water down his theories, especially relativity, E= MC squared, into a simpler form.  He told them to come back the next day, and when they returned he said, “Something moves.”
Union, separation and reunion is the central theme is the scripture. The Isaiah passage that Mary wanted to be read for her service, “they shall run and not be weary” is a song of welcome to the exiles that were held captive in Babylon who were returning to their homes after their long separation. The return will be an awakening of the movement of energy so “they shall run and not be weary.” The 23rd Psalm is a song of a person returning to a reunion with the LORD, as a sheep to its shepherd, to be in the deep energy of the still water by the shadow of death where there is no fear. The Gospel of John passage is Jesus saying that he is that shepherd calling all of us sheep back to reunion with the divine, claiming the spirit, the energy of God within us where this is one flock and one shepherd. Something moves, and it is the energy of the universe.

Union, separation and reunion: Mary went through all of these many times in her life. She left her home in Staunton, Virginia and ended up in the Outer Banks. She got married, had children, and she learned how to live after losses. She was strong and vibrant, she was a real pistol, and then she started losing her strength. She changed churches, even here on the Outer Banks, and got used to different clergy types and congregations.

Every Sunday worship service, every meeting of the Solo group, every Bible study was a reunion followed by a separation followed by a reunion. When she would come to these meetings, she loved being welcomed, having people pay attention to her and fuss all over her. When she had the strength to come up to communion, and if I was holding a baby after she received the bread from me, she would stop and lay her hand on the cheek or feet of the baby to claim a connection. Little children would stop at her seat on the way to communion and give her a hug, and she would touch their cheeks in a sort of benediction, for she knew that the Priest was not the only person in the parish who had the power to bless. Blessing others is a requirement for all followers of God. I think mothers enjoyed seeing their children greet Mary since they envisioned a future when their children would be all grown up and they would all be playing the role of little old lady. She made the role look attractive by giving thanks.

Yet, she could hold a grudge with the best of them, and there were times when the kindly little old lady role wore more than a little thin. We are not asked to be perfect. We are asked to love, and most of the time she could love as she went through union, separation, and reunion. We know that the energy of life is love and it is only in forgiveness that it is set free.

 Today we commend her to God and we declare that she has been fully reunited with the God who knew and loved her before she was born and with all the friends and family she has lost. We come also to ask for strength to meet the days ahead when, after this separation, we will be reunited with her to join the river of energy in which we all live and move and have our being.

Mary English
While raised in a small southern city
Now enjoying as like a queen treated
As arriving at her church to be seated
Where minions tell her she‘s so pretty!
Said she wasn’t flashy, yet was her whim
To have the little children give her a hug
As they passed by on the way to a chug
Of wine or wafer before singing a hymn.
Adored being fussed over, yet didn’t pass
Up an opportunity to take moment to give
Thanks for all blessings by grace she did live
In this life, waiting for new blessing to amass. 
She could be a real trial, but still loved indeed
And in this journey is how we claim to succeed.

Groping For God



A Reflection for the 6th Sunday of Easter               
All Saints’ Episcopal, Southern Shores, NC 
May 21, 2017                                          Thomas E. Wilson, Rector
Acts 17:22-31        1 Peter 3:13-22        John 14:15-21       Psalm 66:7-18

Groping For God
A couple weeks ago I went to see a production of Gilbert and Sullivan's H.M.S. Pinafore, and since this was a traveling show, there were some attempts to bring in some local flavor with a couple inserts about Nags Head, Kill Devil Hills, and Kill Devil Rum. The audience laughed in their appreciation. This is an old ploy used by many visitors, such as the conductor of the Virginia Symphony the week previously who noted the slightly off-color ads with plays on the names of some local restaurants - “Did we really need to know from whom I got my crabs?” This is a dodge used by out of town visitors to suggest that they are not really strangers but people just like us who use the same frame of reference. I remember once when I was a guest preacher in Silver Spring, Maryland and I threw in that I was happy to visit friends there in Silver Springs. It seemed like half of the four hundred people started to murmur that the place was Silver Spring, not Silver Springs. I am not all that sure they bothered to listen to the rest of the sermon.

In the Acts of the Apostle's selection for today, the Apostle Paul stops off in Athens and notes that the people of that city are so religious that they have all these idols on display, even one who is an “Unknown God”. He suggests that it is in the nature of all humans that we “search and grope for God”. He drops in a quote from the Greek 5th or 6th Century BC Poet/ Philosopher Epimenides. In that poem Minos, the son of Zeus, denies that the God Zeus is dead as has been reported by the Cretans. Minos asserts that “All Cretans are liars” (a line that the writer of 1st Titus has Paul quote).
A grave has been fashioned for thee, O High and Holy One
The Cretans are always liars, evil beasts, idle bellies.
But thou diest not, for to eternity thou livest and standest
For in thee we live and move and have our being.

He then adds a quote from the fifth line of Phenomena, by the 3rd century BC Poet Aratus:
Let us begin with Zeus, whom we mortals never leave unspoken.
For every street, every market-place is full of Zeus.
Even the sea and the harbor are full of this deity.
Everywhere everyone is indebted to Zeus.
For we are indeed his offspring ...

Paul is using these quotes to help the Athenians make the jump from their Supreme God, Zeus, to the God that Paul follows. “From one ancestor he made all nations to inhabit the whole earth, and he allotted the times of their existence and the boundaries of the places where they would live, so that they would search for God and perhaps grope for him and find him—though indeed he is not far from each one of us. For ‘In him we live and move and have our being’ ”.  He invites them to look deeper and see God is not trapped in geography or in culture or limited imagination, but ranges free in the core of the universal being. All of us are meant to search and grope for the connection to our reason for existence.

When Jesus, the Risen Lord, is getting ready for the end of his earthly ministry, he tells his disciples that he is not leaving them without strength to continue the journey, for God will send “another Advocate to be with you forever. This is the Spirit of truth, whom the world cannot receive, because it neither sees him nor knows him. You know him, because he abides with you, and he will be in you.”

An advocate is a person who is on your side for each step to open the paths into new directions, who will give you strength to see and understand things on a deeper level. In John’s Gospel, this third part of the Trinity is more fully expanded than in any of the other Gospels. This is the one who moves the disciples past what they know from their experience of walking with Jesus and leads them into places which they had never imagined. The struggle of the church, which we will look at when we get to the book of Acts, is between those who want this faith to focus on the centrality of the teachings of the Preacher Jesus and to worship his divinity and those who see that “the world is changed, changed utterly, a terrible beauty is born”, to steal Yeats’ line.

That struggle still continues, for we often want to nail down all that we know at the present and stay stagnant in that place. Yet, the nature of the universe is that it has been in the process of expanding ever since the Big Bang five billion years ago, and the studies in 2016 from the Hubble telescope tell us that the expansion is 5% - 9% faster than originally theorized.  Our knowledge of God needs to keep expanding in the same way that our knowledge of ourselves in the image of God needs to keep expanding. We cannot stay in the nursery forever.  

Last week Pat and I watched “Hidden Figures”, a movie about three African-American women in Hampton, Virginia in the 1950’s, trapped in a community mired in the clutches of cultures of the past and then challenged into action by working for the Langley Space Center of NASA. They had to grope and search for a new way to deal with the oppression where laws of culture, norms of morality, the basic concepts of math and of themselves all had to be open to growth to enable them to “touch the stars”. It is, at its core, a love story in that they learned how to love their country rather than to be in fear of it. They had to learn how to love who they were growing into being instead of staying trapped in timid souls. They held onto the past things that fed them, like the church to which they belonged, but they made room for new possibilities. In the same way it is also, at its core, a struggle of faith in the groping for Justice in this world as an outward and visible sign of God’s love and our love for God and neighbor.   Reinhold Niebuhr suggested that our capacity for justice makes democracy possible, but our capacity for injustice makes democracy necessary.

It is good to hold on to the lessons of the past and to study history, but we are deluded if we think we have finished learning. The church has had a habit over the centuries of trying to ossify doctrine, to turn it to hard and fast dogma, cementing it into stone over which we stumble. Institutions like to keep things the same, and they only change when questions are asked and the old answers just don’t seem to be adequate enough to sustain life and love.  
I guess what I am asking you to do is to go beyond the creeds and scripture as the final word about God and enter into the idea that God is telling the story of love and justice through us and our actions each day in this broken and changing world, part of God’s continuing creation.  I want us to continue to grope and stretch for the possibilities in our lives that God is offering to us today.


Groping For God
My Illustrated Bible pictured a Heavenly reign
of layered beard God and streaming light shone
with rays like rails while sitting on huge throne
a tyrant looking annoyed as disturbed yet again.

I open my heart to let go that inadequate image;
groping, stretching for God beyond imagination
one who is not so all obsessed with a damnation
rather nourishing love from beginning to finish.

Theologs squeeze divine energy into domesticated
entity; pocket sized, for a convenient smooth ritual
to take the place of a messy, unprocessed spiritual
freedom of loving creator longing to be celebrated
with our becoming co-creators continuing an open-
ended relationship marked by our mutual devotion.

Thursday, May 11, 2017

Vision of Marytr Stephen



A Reflection for 5th Sunday of Easter                                    All Saints’ Episcopal, Southern Shores, NC May 14, 2017                                                                Thomas E. Wilson, Rector
Acts 7:55-60               1 Peter 2:2-10              John 14:1-14               Psalm 31:1-5, 15-16

The Vision of Martyr Stephen:

I came across a quote from the 20th century literary critic and essayist, Edmund Wilson (no relation, alas): "If I could only remember that the days were, not bricks to be laid row on row, to be built into a solid house, where one might dwell in safety and peace, but only food for the fires of the heart."

 In John’s Gospel’s for today, Jesus replies to Philip, “Have I been with you all this time, Philip, and you still do not know me?” What is it to really know someone so that we are able to see God at work?

I was not here last Sunday as Pat and I took the day off and got out of town to visit with two old high school friends. The word “old” is appropriate in that we were friends a long time ago and we are all 70 years old.  One friend I had not seen in 50 years and the other I saw two years ago.  I am clumsy with friends, and if it were not for Pat, my own introverted habits and workaholic tendencies would make me a hermit. Yet I find joy with friends and these friends made the effort to push for Pat and I to join them. 

On this weekend, we spent a lot of time talking and catching up, and I was amazed at all the things they had done in their long journeys from the time we lived in the same neighborhood and attended school together in the very conservative section of upstate New York. The friendship we had had less to do with deep shared interests, with the exception of mysteries about girls and life, and more about geographical proximity, living on parallel streets in the same development,  each named for women in the developer’s life - Alice, Elizabeth and Lolita. We inhabited the same undeveloped lots on which to play pick-up baseball in the spring and another lot for football in the fall, the same river to swim and canoe in the summer, and the same cove to ice skate and to throw snowballs in the winter. We all had siblings who we complained about and parents who we thought were so out of touch. While we complained about some of the same teachers and were embarrassing the same herd of vulnerable eligible girls in front of whom we strutted and tried out our lines and maneuvers, and we gathered in the same places to wonder what it was all about, we all had different interests. Upon graduation, we went in three different directions - one to study Art in Ohio, one to study Political Science in Pennsylvania, and me to North Carolina to study Drama, as a continuation of the days “laying bricks row upon row to build the solid house for safety and peace.”  

The first summer home from college, we all had summer jobs, and we were spending a lot of our free time longing to be back at our college campuses where “real” life was going on instead of being stuck for the summer in what we saw as the backwater of civilization that we used to love but now in our imaginations we were fleeing. One memory I have is riding down the road leaning out the windows of the car banging on the roof singing along to the Rolling Stones complaining, “I Can’t Get No Satisfaction”.  That was the last summer we spent together. We changed majors, we all got married to people we met while we were in college living in those different states and scattered to build our separate futures, “row upon row”..

We communicated mainly by second-hand rumor. One of my friends was the one who tried to do the work of connecting us and those two were helped because their parents still lived in the same neighborhood and kept up better with each other. I did not go to my 10th high school reunion because I was embarrassed that I was back in school working on “row upon row” as was the case for my 20th.  I did go back for my 30th and 50th, but had only brief time to reconnect in situations filled with noise and hundreds of people. I did not meet their wives. But last weekend was a time we all got together with our wives and without the noise of others.

I listened to the stories that we shared, “food for the fires of the heart” and was frustrated that there was not more time to know these people better. We shared heart-breaking stories without the bravado of protecting our images. I was floored with how much love was in each of the marriages, marriages for 50 years so full of love, and that they trusted there was enough love to share with others. I was impressed with how much had changed in their lives, but how much was still there from the past. We are different, but we experience much of the same struggles in re-inventing ourselves instead of staying stagnant. God was there is the space between us. Years ago we spent a lot of time together, but somehow we missed seeing the holy that was there. 

Like Philip in the lesson from John’s Gospel who has been around Jesus for so long, working for him, traveling with him, spending time with him, but he never got around to seeing the presence of God in the space between them. Earlier on in John’s Gospel, Jesus sees the 5000 and asks Philip how could they feed that crowd. All Philip can say is how much this might cost and the threat it might be to the religious enterprise. Philip can’t for the life of him figure out a solution because Philip is busy seeing the limits of what he can’t do and what he knows, instead of going beyond into what God is and can be doing. All he could see and feel was the physical hunger rather than the hunger for the Holy. I have known these friends for almost 60 years and it wasn’t until I stopped thinking of myself as the center of the universe that I was able to be in awe of who God is in each of them. We did not talk much about religion, but God was there in the space between us, sharing the “food to feed the fires of our hearts”.

The vision to see God is also in the lesson from the Book of Acts. Here is Stephen, surrounded by people who hate him and are taking him out to stone him. You would think that Stephen might have some thought of his own safety, protection and agenda. Except Stephen looks with the vision of God and he see in his enemies people whom God loves, and he prays for them for God to forgive them. The God that is in Jesus, the God that lovingly forgives, is found also in Stephen when he has his vision, to see how God sees.

Today, how will we view the day before us? Will we see the day as “food for the fires of the heart” or as “bricks to be laid row on row, to be built into a solid house, where one might dwell in safety and peace.” It all depends on whose eyes we use.

The Vision of Martyr Stephen:
I have dreams of dying saying “Don’t hold this against them.”
As Stephen did when he looked into his death seeing glory
Instead of the limits of his own earthly life ending his story
Or the possibilities about how he won’t collect more to come.
Daily I have to say again to myself that it is not all about me
Or my resentments, my ambitions or my own personal worth
Of all that I have clutched or acquired since the day of my birth
And would I then be able to open my hand and set them all free?
I find that it is important I stop to open my eyes to the glory
Of the stars, the trees, the birds of the air, waves of the sea,
The friends, lovers, opportunities, all that have come to me
As precious gifts from the one who is telling the greater story.
Today let me give thanks “All things come from Thee, O Lord
And of thine own have I given thee,” ever singing final chord.