Thursday, July 11, 2019

Light On Liberty: Poem, reflection and outline for 5th Pentecost


Reflection: Light On Liberty                    Thomas E Wilson

5th Sunday after Pentecost (Proper 10)
Lessons: Amos 7:7-17
8th Century Agricultural worker from the town of Tekoa in the Southern Kingdom of Judah feels called by God to go to a Religious and Patriotic Festival in the Northern Kingdom of Israel and speak truth to power to the ruling elite there about their exploitation of the poor. He is told to mind his own business and go home and keep his mouth shut: which he did not do.
A Psalm which has the structure of God singing to to magistrates (the gods) of the community to do justice and not favor the rich in exploiting the poor.
In this letter the author urges the people to understand that faith means the duty to make a difference in their community.
Jesus is asked about the meaning of the Love of Neighbor and he tells the story where neighbor can mean even the enemy. He changes the obligation to follow the law to an invitation to having the liberty to respond out of compassion.

This reflection is prepared for delivery at a Rally “Light on Liberty OBX” on Friday evening July12, 2019 at Dowdy Park, Nags Head, N.C., to protest the treatment of Asylum seekers and the closing of the U.S. Detention Camps.

Light On Liberty

One of the dangers of this moment in this country's life is that we are walking around with chests full of resentments and bellies full of anger ; we want to get even with the villain de jour, where even our “good works” are tainted with the desire to humiliate the enemy, the lying SOB, who it seems to us to be the cause all of the horrors on the 24 hour news cycle. Who the villain is different, depending on one's political persuasion. We are not here to find reasons for resentments or anger but we are here to shine a light so that we might have the liberty to respond in compassion to those who are hurting on the side of the road of their journeys.

As a Christian Priest I keep going back to the Bible for an inspiration of how to deal with real life. I want to take a look at the story in the Gospel of Luke where Jesus tells a story which we call “The Good Samaritan”, a story about compassion with our neighbor. But first let me look at this with the help of Thrich Nhat Hanh, a Vietnamese Buddhist Monk who teaches a great deal about compassion as a result of living in mindfulness,a heightened awareness of every moment. When Nhat Hanh heard that an American Military Officer said that they had to destroy the village of Ben Tre in order to save it, he became so angry that for awhile he could not do his work of compassion. Each day we nurse the anger and we think we can get rid of it by shouting it out or pushing it down; but the anger stays because it has found a home in our hearts. The way out of the anger is not to give it freedom, or deny it to eliminate the anger but to transform it through mindfulness so that compassionate action might take place.In mindfulness we see how we are connected to all of our brothers and sisters in creation. We find that when we look inside of ourselves, we find that the people we hate so much display the traits that we have tried all of our lives to push down from consciousness. We push them into becoming our shadow, a shadow that shows up only when a bright light shines upon it. Healing comes when we can accept that is part of the rich stew that is part of each one of us.

Lets take a look at the story. Jesus sets it on the Jericho road through the wilderness of Judea. It is a 16 mile hike partly through the desert and it used to be very a dangerous road to travel alone, and if you wander off the path the desert will consume you. About a quarter century ago, my wife and I joined a group of fellow students in Jerusalem to hike part of that road. When I read of the trek that so many of asylum seekers cross our southern border, I am reminded of that hot dusty desert. It was both a place of beauty and of danger that at times felt like a gift of God and God forsaken at the same time. There was a show on the tube this week where one of the first persons to walk on the moon called it a “magnificent desolation”. We started off the walk well rested after a comfortable night in the dormitory, nourished after a good breakfast at the college, carrying all the water we would need, guides we could trust, a monastery in the desert where we could rest, a well marked path and people who would us meet us outside of Jericho where we would spend the night. We had the money to pay for all those things and a senses of assurance but the asylum seekers do not; they only have hope. What is it like to live with hope rather than privilege? What kind of faith does that take?

In the story Jesus speaks of the bandits, the coyotes of their day, who robbed and wounded the traveler.What is it like to be a bandit? What is it like to have a life where human beings are reduced to things, treated not as subjects but as objects? What is it like when you, I, don't care who I hurt? What is it like to be so desperate that that I know no other way than to wish violence on anyone who gets in my way? When I look honestly deep inside myself I have more than a little bit of understanding about what that world looks like? In the cast of characters that make up my story there is someone who has a lot in common with a bandit; the bandit and I are interchangeable. It doesn't mean that I have to keep acting it out and that I don't need people who love me help stop me when I go there. The shared bandit in me needs to be seen, acknowledged, accepted and transformed into a person of compassion.

In the story the traveler lies wounded on the road when a Priest comes by. The Priest feels that he is called to help people into a deeper relationship with God. However, he needs to keep himself pure as part of his job. In his religion, if he gets contaminated, defiled, with human blood , he will not be able to do his job and his job, his calling, his livelihood, his reputation, the opinion and admiration of others is seen as more important that the life of a stranger. He is filled with fear and tries to justify it by thinking: “Who knows; maybe the person deserved to be attacked because he was foolish enough to go on this road alone? Maybe he is a bad person and this is God's judgment?” As I look deep inside myself I see the fear and the arrogance of the Priest to be not unknown to me. The shared Priest in me needs to be seen, acknowledged, accepted and transformed into a person of compassion.

In the story there is a Levite, a person skilled in the law. She is busy; like Alice's White Rabbit: “I'm late, I'm late for a very important date!” She feels sorry, but bad things happen; as my High School Football line coach used to say “T.S.- Tough Situation”. She has to work for a living - there is a mortgage and car payment due and kid's soccer practice to attend. This would be one more damned thing to do! As I look deep inside myself the intense desire to stick with the safe routine of the Levite is not unknown to me. The shared Levite in me needs to be seen, acknowledged, accepted and transformed into a person of compassion.

In the story there is the stranger, the Samaritan, who has his own problems, agendas, fears and failings and he could feel anger toward a person of the tribe that kept putting his tribe down. He could have been taught resentment toward the way his parents and parents' parents, and so on, had been treated by people of the Travelers's ilk. This is is a man who is under no legal or moral duty to care for the traveler. Yet, he shines a light on how he is connected to the stranger as a fellow child of God and he lives into a liberty to have mercy on someone who is so different. Knowing a kinship with all who are wounded, he interrupts his journey and binds up the traveler's wounds. He inconveniences himself by placing the traveler of his donkey taking him to shelter and digs deep into his time and pockets to pay for the shelter.

The last character of the story is the Inn Keeper who earns a living caring for Traveler. The Samaritan doesn't try to convert the Inn Keeper and fill him with guilt about he should care for the Traveler for free. The Samaritan knows that he can only give what he has from his heart and he cannot give what is not his to give. What others give is up to them and the light they shine within themselves for the liberty to give.

Poem: Light On Liberty
Looking at each other's chests puffed
in resentment, bellies swollen with anger,
with harsh words ringing a loud clangor
as if released from feelings long stuffed,
but only an illusion release into loud hate,
and vitriol of assigning even more blames
on loss of freedom, while forging chains
of old behavior out grown when we're eight.
We can wallow in dark guilt of old misery,
or shining bright light on denied shadows
to see how we are deeply connected close
and transform us into compassion's liberty.
Releasing us from what we think we've been
to live as each other's brothers and sisters kin.


Thomas E Wilson

Wednesday, July 3, 2019

Peace Is On This Place


Poem and Preliminary Notes for Reflection of 7 July, 2019
Thomas E. Wilson + Retired
Theme: “God's peace is on this place”

Lessons for the 4th Sunday After Pentecost July 7, 2019

Part of the Elisha Saga of stories. The prophet Elisha in the Northern Kingdom of Israel, Samaria, agrees to help bring about a restoration of wholeness and healing for Naaman, the General of the Armies of an enemy of Israel. Elisha say he will do this so that Naaman “may know that there is a Prophet in Israel”. The story of the Northern Kingdom is full of stories of Corrupt and Incompetent Kings who keep turning their backs on God, but God is still there and calls faithful people to bring in peace to those who come to that place. The prideful alien Naaman immerses himself in a new found grace given by strangers.
The Psalmist sings a Thanksgiving of being restored to wholeness.
Paul writes that all the religious stuff that we practice is irrelevant since God's Peace, wholeness is already here for all those who will claim it.
Jesus sends out 72 (or 70) men (and women?) to proclaim God's love and healing. He tells them: “Whatever house you enter, first say, `Peace to this house!' And if anyone is there who shares in peace, your peace will rest on that person . . . cure the sick who are there, and say to them, `The kingdom of God has come near to you.' But whenever you enter a town and they do not welcome you, go out into its streets and say, `Even the dust of your town that clings to our feet, we wipe off in protest against you. Yet know this: the kingdom of God has come near.'”

Thoughts:
SHALOM, God's peace, is what good Jews would say “Hello” or “God Bless” to a neighbor; it doesn't just mean an absence of conflict but a declaration of healing, wholeness, prosperity and justice. It is a declaration that the space between us is Holy Ground and God is present and will use us to help to bring it about. Kingdom of God is not a geographic place but a metaphor for any place where live as if God's love and wholeness are present in people's lives be they citizens or aliens

This is the week of the 4th of July which is an anniversary of the day the 2nd Continental Congress set forth a document that defined the underlying hopes of a nation “We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness.”

In the news this week are stories of Immigrants who have crossed our river border searching for a new healing of life. Painful pictures of a father and child drowning to death in the Rio Grande in a pursuit of happiness.

Like Israel's Kings, we have at times chosen leaders who are corrupt and/or incompetent and we have often overlooked the Creator given rights of our neighbors: Life, Liberty and the Pursuit of Happiness.
We have often thought of our own desires and advantages as more important than our neighbors We as Christians are called to proclaim by word and deed that the Kingdom of God has come near by working for God's Peace.

Personal Remembrance of receiving “Peace”
I had an older brother, Paul, who was the much loved only child, until a year and four days later I came on the scene as the alien interloper. He may have resented me but he also knew he had a responsibility for me. One summer day, I do not know if I was 3 or 4, we were at my grandfather's place for the annual visit back to the country,and we were at the pond on his property. My father was still at work in Salvador and my mother was looking after my infant younger sister, Anne. I was instructed of course to not go into the deep end, but I never really paid attention to direction well even then. I remember going out deeper and I still have a memory of seeing water above my eyes and how beautiful it was. Before I had a chance to breathe in much of the water, Paul grabbed me and pulled me back to safety.

It has been over a quarter of a century since my older brother died, but each year I realize that Paul saved my life to have liberty and the pursuit of happiness from the choice I made that day; he did a small thing but proclaimed Peace to me.

It was a small thing he did, but it made all the difference in my life. What do I do, small or large, in proclaiming Peace?

POEM
Peace Is On This Place:
My proud Naaman steps deep in alien Jordan river
guessing that the waters in Damascus were better
to wash clean; pure without being such a debtor
to that grace not demanding payment to the giver.

I open my eyes to see water above my sighs,
sun dappling light highlighting pretty bubbles
rising to the surface, taking away the troubles
caused by chasing my life after the shiny prize.

There is a peace in which I knew I could die
in order to live in another way so I would care
for my brothers I knew not of and life to share
for liberty and pursuit of happiness under the sky.

Breathing a peace that came beyond understanding,
I resolve anew to reach beyond mere tribal branding.

Tuesday, June 25, 2019

TURNING OUR FACES


Poem and Partial Outline
29 June, 2019
3rd Sunday After Pentecost

One Theme that calls out to me: Where do we “set out face”?

2 Kings 2:1-2, 6-14In this story Northern Kingdom 9th Century Prophets, Elijah and Elisha are in their last days together on earth. Elisha, Hebrew for God is Salvation, is the disciple of Elijah, Hebrew for God is YHWH. The Elijah saga is dominated by this prophet who stood stood up against King Ahab and Queen Jezebel who were champions of the Canaanite God, Baal.The classic story is the contest between the Prophets and Priests of Baal and Elijah the Prophet of YHWH, on whose God has the power to answer prayers. Elijah is the Icon for the Prophet who stands up against the powers of the state. Elisha's saga of stories, on the other hand, has the Prophet being an advisor to the powers of the state.

Elijah knows that his days on earth, his unique ministry is coming to an end; he has his face set on his total Union with God. Elisha has his face set on passing on the power of the prophets to the next Generation. Elijah sets his face to the eternal to be united with God and Elisha sets his face to pay witness to the continuing presence of God in Israel.

The Psalmist sings about how in the midst of trouble he set his face to God for strength
Paul is setting his face to the Spirit that gives us freedom to live a life in Christ: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, generosity, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control. Instead of a focus of being afraid of God's judgment on the outward display of being abiders of the law we become free to live in to our deeper nature of being Children of God.
Jesus knows that his days on earth are limited if he goes on with his ministry but he “sets his face to Jerusalem” to challenge to center of the power that keeps people in fear. He rebukes the “Sons of Thunder, James and John for their wish to punish those in the way or who dissapoint.

TURNING OUR FACES
Monday begins by setting his face to be in wonder
how all his fellow creatures are now seen anew,
filled with admiration for strong holding like glue,
the fabric of our lives no longer being torn asunder.

Tuesday begins when by setting his face to forgive
all failings and lapses that have been done to be,
not because they're deserved but because he's free
to put down those burdens and really get to live.

Wednesday begins when he no longer needs to prove
that he is worthy to be loved, no longer enslaved
by the opinions of others, better instincts betrayed
with the desire to please so they might approve.

Thursday begins by setting a face to speak truth
no longer keeping head bowed to power strutting
in order to use his silence as an injustice abutting
tactic to rule by forceful use of red claw and tooth.

Friday begins by setting his face to be given away,
opening of hands freely and his cheek to be struck
knowing that purpose of life is not trusting in luck
to fill barns but action that souls and hearts'll sway.

Saturday begins by setting his face to accept loss
as a chance to enter into stillness of God's chariot
trusting God's love not depart even Judas Iscariot
and will bring us all into reunion through a cross.

Sunday begins setting our face to new beginning
leaving the past and old ways of thinking behind
as our eyes are opened as we are no longer blind,
when now bells no longer toll but joyous ringing.

Wednesday, June 19, 2019

Parson Tom's Hijacked Prayer


Parson Tom's Hijacked Prayers
Poem and Reflection Outline for 2nd Sunday After Pentecost (Proper 7)



The lessons for June 23rd are:

The passage from 1st Kings is the story of Elijah, fleeing from Jezebel trying to hear God which only is able to reach him in “sheer silence”
The Psalm speaks of how the soul longs for God as the Deer longs for the water brooks,
The Epistle from Galatians says that the old identity of dutiful play actor under the direction of the law is dead and replaced by being “in” Christ.
Luke remembers Jesus healing the man possessed with many demons.

I have been thinking that I am like that man who has many demons, some acknowledged and some hidden in shadows shadow. Often when I go into prayer the demons come and tickle my ego with fantasies about how I might impress God and others with my power. The image of me as Errol Flynn, the swashbuckling Matinee Idol, is one of my demons and comes forth when I am tempted to swagger and see any difficulties as a matter of overcoming with my own energy and power like Robin Hood fighting off the Sheriff's men and conquering Lady Marian.
This poem led me to realize again how hard it was for for Elijah to stop and listen, the person ruled by rules to give up roles, and the demoniac to give up his demons. It is not something that happened 2000 years ago but happens for me each time I slow down and listen to God. This is where If I was working for a living I would sit down and write a reflection. Where would you go with it?

Parson Tom's Hijacked Prayers
Today I decide not to listen to sheer silence,
instead wanting to play with my demons
who wait inside listening for a summons
from imagination where once sought asylum.
This moment I call a road show Errol Flynn
in residence to enter with smarmy charm
being able my many enemies to disarm
while seducing new lovers' hearts to spin.
“Come me hearties; let us conquer hearts,
and prove our worth for whatever God may be!”
The problem is this God looks a lot like me
waiting in central casting office for bit parts.
But now, breathe in, out, and closely listen;
for the deepest spirit comes up to audition.

Tuesday, June 18, 2019

Are You Listening, Paying Attention





Are You Listening, Paying Attention?
There is a lot of silence space takes
and a heck of a lot of noise inside
that covers us up in a galactic ride
as our moon love to planet makes.
They paid attention to each other
saying we'll always work together
day in, night out, in dancers tether,
sharing womb of same God Mother.
What would happen if we'd dance
as if we heard the music of the stars,
their steps directing the same as ours,
since we're all living in God's manse?
Jubilee's announces us to begin singing
new hope of our healing and forgiving.




On January 17th, 2019 I started to prepare to preach my last reflection at St. George's, Lake Landing on January 27, 2019 for I was planning to start as Interim at Christ Church, Elizabeth City the week after that. I was also going to do a House Blessing  for a special family at St. George's. My first step in preparing a message is to write a poem based on my understanding of the Lectionary lessons for that day. One of the themes is that when I bless a house I don not have the power to make things "holy" but I have the honor to being able to point out the Holy in the ordinary. I had finished my poem and I started to write a prose reflection based on the lessons. The next day my wife had to go to the Outer Banks Hospital emergency department with a lung infection and was transferred to a larger hospital in Chesapeake where she stayed for two weeks. The  specialist told me that my wife was going to need my help and I should clear my schedule. Therefore, I did not do the service at St. George's and I backed out of working at Christ Church. I found I needed to pay attention. I think the poem was a synchronicity, a part of the Spirit's telling me what was coming up in our lives and how I needed to pay attention..

Pat is still in the process of healing and we just returned yesterday for a three day repeat hospital visit for another issue. Today, six months later, I was going through my computer to clean up my files and I came across the unfinished file of the poem and the introduction to the reflection. I will leave it unfinished  but I realized I still needed to listen to the Spirit and I will try to do the  discipline of writing a poem for my soul's health.




From the Psalm for today starts off with the image that God is speaking all the time from the heavens silently proclaiming, and the earth echoing the message of God's love and presence and the faithful in the everyday interaction in the community and then the singer of the Psalm sings; “Let the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be acceptable in your sight, * O Lord, my strength and my redeemer.”. This verse is the prayer that many preachers give, either aloud or silent as they prepare to give a reflection, sermon or reflection when the church gathers together to hear the good news from God. The singer and the Nation that sings these songs is asking God's help to hear what God is saying as the people gather together. The three other lessons have a theme of people gathering together to hear the good news from God.

The passage from Nehemiah has the reading of a portion of Torah when the exiles have returned home Babylon. When the people returned the Temple had been torn down by the Babylonians and the people had lived as strangers in a strange land longing to hear God calling them to return. They have come back and have rebuilt a much less lavish version of the Old Temple, They gather to worship and are overwhelmed to hear Holy Words in Holy Space as they are aware that they are living in Holy Time when God is present. The past, when they wandered far from God, is over; forgiveness begins a new day in a Community of Faith. They hear the good news that they are a community gathered to walk together on Holy Ground as the space between them is filled with God's presence.

Paul, in his letter to the Corinthians, writes to tell them that each of them has a gift given by God's Holy Spirit and the task is to listen to discern what are their particular gift. Paul had written to them because they were squabbling amongst each other over so many issues of resentment. They are so busy arguing they don't have the inclination to listen to anything but the words in their own silos. Paul uses the analogy of the community as a body, a Holy body to do the Holy Work of bringing new life to the world in which they live. The past where the Corinthians needed to rely on their own agendas can now be over if they can only stop to listen and discern what God's Spirit is saying to each one of them in a Community of Faith

Jesus in the Gospel lesson comes back to his hometown of Nazareth and filled with God's Spirit preaches the Good News. The Good News is that God is present and calling them to participate in God's Holy Time, the Time of Jubilee when sins are forgiven and the community







Thursday, January 3, 2019

Paying Attention (Reflection and Poem for Epiphany Sunday)


A Reflection for Epiphany Sunday                       St. George's Episcopal Church, Engelhard, NC January 6, 2019                                                     Thomas E Wilson, Preacher
Paying Attention
In the Church Calendar this is the Feast of the Epiphany and the 12th Day of Christmas. In the Secular Calendar this is the first Sunday of the New Year and the 6th day after New Year's Resolutions. So, what was your resolution? One of mine was to pay attention. I decided I needed to do more often as I was looking over the lessons for today. Looking at the first two Chapters of the Gospel of Matthew; there are four stories about paying attention.

The first story when Joseph was asleep and he has a dream to which he pays attention. I believe that dreams are a way that God usesbto speak to us. Pat and I have studied dreams for a number of years. I do not take dreams literally but I do think they are messages from my personal unconscious which goes back to when before I was born, and the collective unconscious which stretches back to the beginning of the universe, given in symbolic form. We take the dreams and look at the symbols and then prayerfully consider them and what they might mean in my life and how God might be using them. God is constantly speaking to us; the trouble is that when we are awake, we are overwhelmed by the noise of the ego of our conscious mind about our own agendas. We are so focused about our own desires, we cannot see the bigger picture. In dreams however, our own egos are asleep and we are open to hear what God is speaking As Frederick Buechner writes: “I choose to believe that (God) speaks nonetheless, and the reason that (God's) words are impossible to capture in human language is of course that they are ultimately always incarnate words. They are words fleshed out in the everydayness no less than in the crises of our own experience.” In this first story Joseph's ego had made a decision to end the engagement with Mary because he was afraid of looking foolish in the eyes of his neighbors. However, the dream with images and symbols told him that the deeper meaning of his own life had more in common with God's love than his own pride.

To pay attention we have to go beyond the limits of our mind and enter into the mystery of awe; awe that there are so many things that are beyond our puny understanding. Richard Rohr in his meditation for last Wednesday wrote:
Jesus clearly believed in change. In fact, the first public word out of his mouth was later translated into the Greek imperative verb metanoeite, which literally means “change your mind” or “go beyond your mind” (see Matthew 4:17 and Mark 1:15). Unfortunately, in the fourth century, St. Jerome translated the word into Latin as paenitentia (“repent” or “do penance”), initiating a host of moralistic connotations that have colored Christians’ understanding of the Gospels ever since. The word metanoeite referred to a primal change of mind, worldview, or way of processing and perceiving—and only by corollary about a specific change in behavior. This common misunderstanding puts the cart before the horse; we think we can change a few externals while our underlying worldview often remains narcissistic and self-referential.
This misunderstanding contributed to a puritanical, externalized, and largely static notion of the Christian message that has followed us to this day. Faith became about external requirements that could be enforced, punished, and rewarded, much more than an actual change of heart and mind, which Jesus described as something that largely happens “in secret, where your Father who sees in secret can reward you” (Matthew 6:4, 6, 18).

The second paying of attention is when the Magi see a star. The Magi were Zoroastrian priests from the Parthian Empire, modern day Iran and much of the Middle East. They studied dreams, astronomy and natural phenomena which they understood was the way their God, Ahura Mazda, was speaking to them. Then they prayerfully considered what they had seen or imagined and interpreted them for possible options for action. They believed that all of the universe is connected and all events had meaning for our lives. When they saw the star, they decided that this heavenly event had earthy significance. They decided after study and prayer to take a journey west to Judea. In August, 2017 Pat and I went down to South Carolina to see the total Solar Eclipse, it was also a pilgrimage to cause us to take less seriously what our life might look like after I retired the next year, a changing the way we were used to seeing the universe. We were standing in a field, looking up into the sky and all we could do was to laugh in wonder. Now of course we understood the scientific explanations for an eclipse but since we believe that all things in God's universe are connected we chose to also see the spiritual dimension of us stopping to pay attention. It did not tell us of what we should invest in the Stock Market but our prayers of thanksgiving got deeper. In case you are interested, there will be a lunar eclipse, a Blood Moon, on the night of the 20th and morning of the 21st of this month from about 10:30 PM to 2:30 AM. The next time you can see a Blood Moon will be on July 27th but you will have to go the Indian Ocean to see it.

The Magi went to the Jerusalem Priests and asked if they might be of help. The Priests studied and looked in their books and passed on the information. However, since the Temple Crowd were in the pay of King Herod, they thought it best not to explore its meaning further. Herod was not overjoyed about a Son of David being born as a rival to Herod. Herod was an Idumean, a descendent of Esau not Issac; and although he was raised as a Jew, he was seen as an outsider and was only in power by the support of Rome. Herod tried to curry favor with the Jews by massive building projects like the Temple Complex but those around him did not fully trust him, after all he executed one of his wives, her mother and brother, and three of his sons out of his fear of losing control. Herod paid attention because he saw plots against him wherever he looked. In the Magi's Zoroastrian Religion Ahura Mazda, the Creator God, had an adversary, Angra Mainyu, the destructive spirit of Evil, which 1st Century BC Judaism and 1st Century AD Christianity would borrow as Satan, and the Magi would have thought that Herod was under the rule of that demon. Herod sent the Magi on their way as part of a plan to kill this possible rival to his throne.

The Magi paid attention and went to Bethlehem as a part of their pilgrimage to find a deeper spiritual meaning in their lives. They took the natural event of a birth of a child and in it they saw the deeper miracle of life. Matthew writes that “they were overwhelmed with joy.” Joy is usually the response when we stop to pay attention to what God is doing..

While they were there they paid attention to a dream about avoiding Herod. When they left, Joseph had another dream telling him of danger from Herod and to go to Egypt for safety. Joseph paid attention and stayed there as a refugee. After a few years Joseph had been paying attention to the news from Jerusalem, when he heard that Herod was dead, he thought that he was safe in going back home, But he had another dream which warned him to avoid Bethlehem and go to East nowhere Nazareth to stay off the radar. He paid attention and the Gospel continues

Matthew begins his Gospel be telling us that we need to pay attention because something is happening because everything is connected. Later on, he remembers Jesus warning that there will be wars and rumors of wars but they would need to pay attention to a deeper truth that the Risen Christ will be with is us even to the end of the ages.

Again to quote from Frederick Buechner:
If I were called upon to state in a few words the essence of everything I was trying to say both as a novelist and as a preacher, it would be something like this: Listen to your life. See it for the fathomless mystery that it is. In the boredom and pain of it no less than in the excitement and gladness: touch, taste, smell your way to the holy and hidden heart of it because in the last analysis all moments are key moments, and life itself is grace.”


Paying Attention
Long journey from Christmas to Epiphany
took twelve days for some Zoroastrian priests
bringing precious presents out of the easts,
of the frankincense, myrrh and gold brilliantly.
Getting to the house, they dropped the gifts,
got down on their knees, the formulas saying,
spent some more time to their God praying,
and left giving Herod's report short shrifts.
Basically, that is what we are called to do;
dropping our treasures and our conclusions,
remaining open to see desires as illusions,
defining reality as if we didn't have a clue.
This is a wondrous universe made for awe
where the holiest prayer is a joyous guffaw.



Saturday, December 22, 2018

Reflection for 3rd Sunday of Advent (poem expanded)


A Reflection for IV Advent                                    St. George Episcopal Church Engelhard, N.C. December 23, 2018                                                Thomas E Wilson, Supply Celebrant
My Love Is My Gift For You
On this last Sunday of Advent, we light the last of the four candles in the Advent Wreath. We began with the first candle of Hope to lighten the darkness at the end of the year. We moved from Hope to the second candle of Peace. With Hope and Peace we were able to see the light from the candle of Joy. When Hope, Peace and Joy lighten our path we are able to shine forth Love; Love, the last candle. It is then, with Hope, Peace, Joy and Love that we are able receive the Light of Christ in the Christ Candle.

Lets clear up some language; Love is not a feeling. Feelings come and go and are often connected to digestion. Many feelings are investments of emotional energy on a person, place, thing or idea, what Freud would call a “Cathexis” upon an object. The word Cathexis comes from the Greek work “I occupy”, where one transfers one's own energy, either positive or negative, onto the object. Pat and I do dream work and we see dreams as a collection of symbols. We consider dreams Soul Work, where the Spirit, positive or negative, is speaking. When we work in a group we ask group members to share their dreams and then we focus in on the object with the greatest energy, like a door, a light, a lock, a classroom, a food, a movie star, politician, a body part or whatever. Think of a dream that you might have had and what energy seems to be invested in a particular object which is itself a symbol of something deeper.

This idea goes into everyday life as well. For instance I might say I love my mother's homemade meatloaf. The emotional energy is about my mother serving it as the family gathered around the dinner table. It was a time of quiet, polite space with each other, as we would share about our days. My older brother and I would NOT kick each other under the table or make fun of our younger brother. My mother was not an adventurous cook but often in the middle of the week we would have been involved in setting up the meat grinder after coming home from school and turning the crank and seeing her mix up the ground meat, cook it in the oven and we would smell it cooking, have that dinner that night and we might have a meat loaf sandwich for lunch the next day. My emotional energy went beyond the flavor and into what it was, a symbol of being in a family where there is hope, peace, joy and love.

Feelings of love and fear start within ourselves from the constant barrage of our ego to meet our selfish wants and to avoid our subconscious fears buried in memory. The way out is to listen to a new reality based on love not fear. Frederick Buechner wrote: “We are so used to hearing what we want to hear and remaining deaf to what it would be well for us to hear . . . that it is hard to break the habit.”

When I first met the woman who would become my wife; I disliked her intensely when I first saw her as she was hanging around with a bunch of unsmiling women, wrapped with big scarves, and smoking little cigarettes. My projections on her were that she was a small angry woman, surrounding herself with other bitter women complaining about how all men were scum. One conversation with her and I knew she considered me in that category of scum. My energy was not about who she really was but about the symbol that she represented to me and the treat to my ego. It would be years before I could see her as apart from the object in which I was investing negative energy.

It works the other way as well; in my life before, I had invested positive energy in girls who were symbols of hoped for adoration of me. Therefore, my relationships were mainly all about me and what I wanted or feared. But it was only after I was able to grow up and know that I was loved before the beginning of the universe and see how I was in the habit of using people as objects that I was able to learn how to love others outside of my projections.

Projections are like judging the present by the wrapping and never getting around to the present itself. While we are at it, unwrapping or wrapping a present around Christmas or birthday is not about getting or giving loot, but an outward symbol about giving and receiving love. But if it is given or received as an obligation, it is literally one more damn thing and God knows we have enough things.

Love is not a feeling but a free decision to act, to commit, to give oneself, then saying it and then doing it. Love begins in creation as God, who is Love, speaks the word of Love, and through that Love the universe is created, which the Apostle John in the 1st chapter of his Gospel sees as the Christ, the Word made flesh, Jesus. Jesus is the living image of God, as we are, made from the dust of the universe's explosion into being. Love is the decision that Mary makes to give birth to God's love. Love is the decision that Joseph has to take what could be shame upon himself and give himself to Mary and the child. Love is the decision that Jesus takes to give himself to God's healing of, and reconciling ministry with God's children. Love is the decision that we make in giving ourselves to God and neighbor. Love is the decision, without the illusions of self benefit, to unselfishly give ourselves.

Love comes when one has hope, when one has peace within oneself and peace with one's world, when one has a deeper joy not dependent on circumstances; then love can a gift to oneself and to others. Love is the decision to give it. Love is a gift.

I wrote a poem for this week and I thought I would just read it instead of doing a prose reflection, but I decided to unpack what I was saying behind the poem. I made copies of the poem for you to take home with you. Let me read it and let me ask you to join me and say out loud the refrain at the end of every quatrain stanza, so you can hear yourself say out loud “My love is my gift for you.” When you say that refrain, think of to whom you need to say it and make a decision to say it and to do it. This next week, as you read the poem at home, see who else comes to mind, could even be a chance for you to hear God saying it to you. Love is a decision to give yourself.
My Love Is My Gift For You
Slowly, God turning dream to song
singing Word, creates Galactic stew,
image-ing us from stardust of earth,
to hear “My love is my gift for you.”

Fearfully, Mary turns to see the angel
kneeling, hailing “Girl dressed in blue,
we know not why, but you are favored.
to hear “'My love is my gift for you.' ”

Joseph wakes in God's ongoing dream,
informing of task; a child to raise true
of heart, mind and soul as precious son
to hear “My love is my gift for you.”

The Innkeeper's wife sees the couple
with no place to stay and time is due,
she offers finest stable straw, and then
to hear “My love is my gift for you.”

The shepherds sense the angels invite
them come to Bethlehem and to view
a child to be their hope, peace and joy
to hear “My love is my gift for you.”

Mary holds all these things in her heart
seeing visions of both pure joy and rue,
raising their child to live and to die and
to hear “My love is my gift for you.”

From the East the Magi come placing
gold, frankincense and myrrh in queue,
leaving quietly as wisdom allows them
to hear “My love is my gift for you.”

We walk away from wrapping presents,
our fingers sticky with glitter and glue
hoping we'd have grace either to say or
to hear “My love is my gift for you.”

The outward packages are never enough
to proclaim what's in our souls we knew;
reason we are together is we were lucky
to hear “My love is my gift for you.”

We are older, the children have grown and
under the tree shows presents as very few,
yet turning to each other, we pray or kiss
to hear, “My love is my gift for you.”

This new year is a time for us to promise
that each day we'll choose to begin anew
forgiving the hurts, treasuring the joy and
to hear “My love is my gift for you.”

At the service, an offering plate comes
as way giving to God and neighbor too;
but best gift is living in way for God
to hear “My love is my gift for you.”

The day'll come when my table place
will be empty as I bid the world adieu
and on the other shore, again a chance
to hear “My love is my gift for you.”